8.28.2005
Exclusive Three Ways To Avoid "The Talk"
All those years of coaches telling you that “you win games with defense,” can be disregarded, forgotten, ignored. If you want to remain “friends with benefits” while avoiding “the talk,” which would inevitably drag your ass into unfortunate fidelity land, offense is the key word. 
You can tell when it happens, that change in her eyes after your third or fourth 3am animalistic sex-capade, the way she watches you as you slip your shoes on and head to the door. She wants you to stay, sleep next to her and talk. And as you rush out the door, half buzzed and scrambling for cab fare, you ask yourself, “why can’t it just be sex?” Well, it can be.
Offensive Move #1: After a few weeks of raunchy romps and heartless humps, find a good (sober) time to have the “anti-talk.” The “anti-talk” is the antidote for “the talk.” It negates “the talk,” delays it, keeps it inside where it belongs. The “anti-talk” consists of two parts. The first consists of explaining to her that you like spending time with her and that you always have fun with her. Secondly, tell her that you like how she is able to keep things light-hearted and not have profound emotional conversations all the time since both your lives are so crazy and busy, it’s nice to keep it simple and fun. She not only won’t reply to it, but can’t. You have beaten her to the punch and made it difficult for her to disagree-she wouldn’t want to risk sounding desperate and it shows her you are thinking about your relationship (even if it is about how to avoid one). You have just given yourself at least another few weeks before she approaches you with any sort of “talk,” and you have left yourself, and her legs, open to a good, carefree time.
Offensive Move #2: There is one thing your coach emphasized that should be a rule implied in your life if you are trying to avoid “the talk.” During pre-season, it is essential to stick to the “two-a-day’ practice schedule. In working to avoid “the talk” and keep her a “friend with benefits,” you must work off of the “two-a-week” regimen. This means that from Monday through Thursday you can see her two out of four days/nights, your pick when, but best to do every other night. This will keep her at a safe distance so as to not get attached on either end, and to even have a few “friends with benefits” in the mix at once, alternating nights (just try to keep their names straight).It is crucial to not make plans for Fridays or Saturdays; these are the premiere nights, “game days” if you will, also known to women as “date nights.” If you make plans for these two significant days of the week, prepare yourself very soon for “the talk” and book yourself some cooking lessons, because she may be wanting Sunday brunch.
Offensive Move #3: Tell her that you want her to meet your friends, because she is important to you (a.k.a. important to your d***). Then call your second string friends, the ones who ride the bench when the usual crew is out of town, and tell them you will meet them for a drink. You want the second string because they see less playing time, you don’t want the usual guys thinking she is more than a “late night snack.” Note: at a bar always automatically buy her favorite drink and hand it to her. Women assume if you know how she takes it, you also know how she likes it. It is vital that you introduce her to your friends using her first name, then pause, and say “you know, the one I have been telling you about” (of course at this point all you have actually told them is to smile and raise their beers towards the clueless but suddenly feeling special girl on your arm). If a girl thinks a guy has been talking to his boys about her when she is not around, she will think the talk is implied, and she will assume you really do “care for her.” It will prolong the talk at least another two weeks, and of course, another couple of unattached rendezvous’.
Please note: there is no cure to avoid the talk indefinitely. The above “moves” are simply means of prolonging your inevitable fate...so for now, enjoy!.
[**PimpWiz.com EXCLUSIVE**]
Other ASK Lauren Articles:
A New Breed of Woman
"How to Get Your Girl from Chic to Freak
"How to Lose a Girl in Ten Seconds"
"It’s Halloween Again, This Year Go Home with Something Sweet
"What Her Drink Says About Her"
"Top 5 Ways to Get a Hot Girl From the Club to your Apartment"
"So You Got Her Digits, Now What?"
You can tell when it happens, that change in her eyes after your third or fourth 3am animalistic sex-capade, the way she watches you as you slip your shoes on and head to the door. She wants you to stay, sleep next to her and talk. And as you rush out the door, half buzzed and scrambling for cab fare, you ask yourself, “why can’t it just be sex?” Well, it can be. Offensive Move #1: After a few weeks of raunchy romps and heartless humps, find a good (sober) time to have the “anti-talk.” The “anti-talk” is the antidote for “the talk.” It negates “the talk,” delays it, keeps it inside where it belongs. The “anti-talk” consists of two parts. The first consists of explaining to her that you like spending time with her and that you always have fun with her. Secondly, tell her that you like how she is able to keep things light-hearted and not have profound emotional conversations all the time since both your lives are so crazy and busy, it’s nice to keep it simple and fun. She not only won’t reply to it, but can’t. You have beaten her to the punch and made it difficult for her to disagree-she wouldn’t want to risk sounding desperate and it shows her you are thinking about your relationship (even if it is about how to avoid one). You have just given yourself at least another few weeks before she approaches you with any sort of “talk,” and you have left yourself, and her legs, open to a good, carefree time.
Offensive Move #2: There is one thing your coach emphasized that should be a rule implied in your life if you are trying to avoid “the talk.” During pre-season, it is essential to stick to the “two-a-day’ practice schedule. In working to avoid “the talk” and keep her a “friend with benefits,” you must work off of the “two-a-week” regimen. This means that from Monday through Thursday you can see her two out of four days/nights, your pick when, but best to do every other night. This will keep her at a safe distance so as to not get attached on either end, and to even have a few “friends with benefits” in the mix at once, alternating nights (just try to keep their names straight).It is crucial to not make plans for Fridays or Saturdays; these are the premiere nights, “game days” if you will, also known to women as “date nights.” If you make plans for these two significant days of the week, prepare yourself very soon for “the talk” and book yourself some cooking lessons, because she may be wanting Sunday brunch.
Offensive Move #3: Tell her that you want her to meet your friends, because she is important to you (a.k.a. important to your d***). Then call your second string friends, the ones who ride the bench when the usual crew is out of town, and tell them you will meet them for a drink. You want the second string because they see less playing time, you don’t want the usual guys thinking she is more than a “late night snack.” Note: at a bar always automatically buy her favorite drink and hand it to her. Women assume if you know how she takes it, you also know how she likes it. It is vital that you introduce her to your friends using her first name, then pause, and say “you know, the one I have been telling you about” (of course at this point all you have actually told them is to smile and raise their beers towards the clueless but suddenly feeling special girl on your arm). If a girl thinks a guy has been talking to his boys about her when she is not around, she will think the talk is implied, and she will assume you really do “care for her.” It will prolong the talk at least another two weeks, and of course, another couple of unattached rendezvous’.
Please note: there is no cure to avoid the talk indefinitely. The above “moves” are simply means of prolonging your inevitable fate...so for now, enjoy!.
[**PimpWiz.com EXCLUSIVE**]
Other ASK Lauren Articles:
A New Breed of Woman
"How to Get Your Girl from Chic to Freak
"How to Lose a Girl in Ten Seconds"
"It’s Halloween Again, This Year Go Home with Something Sweet
"What Her Drink Says About Her"
"Top 5 Ways to Get a Hot Girl From the Club to your Apartment"
"So You Got Her Digits, Now What?"
Labels: Ask Lauren, women
Pimpin' Thoughts:
I have implored similar techniques and it works. I call the "anti-talk" the disclaimer. It is that small print she knows she should have read at the beggining. A statement that you can refer to down the road when things get too mushy. And she has to respect you because you were honest from the start.
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